(posting 5 of 6) <<>> The Beachside Island PUTUTUTUTUTUT.... Akane raced towards Watermelon Island in a water speeder. The only incongruous item was a pot of hot water tied to the back of her seat as she replayed the event of the last few minutes. "A legendary kendo training ground?" she had asked. "On Watermelon Island?" The proprietor of a local shop had nodded. "That's what I've heard. Also, the poor people who go there to train invariably lose their memory. Probably some really harsh training going on there." "That explains it all," Akane said to herself as she drove on, "so that he could defeat Ranma, Kuno went training his katana skills on Watermelon Island. Essentially, a trade of memory for swordfighting!" She drove on. "Ranma's in big trouble..." ************************************************************************ Meanwhile, Ranma had been discovered by Kuno in the watermelon patch. "Hehehe...I've got you cornered now," Kuno leered. "Damn," Ranma said as she gritted her teeth. Kuno lifted up his sword and made a lunge at Ranma. "DATE ME OR DIE!" "Forget it, weirdo!" Ranma immediately starting picking up the heaviest objects nearby (which happened to be watermelons), and started hurling them at Kuno. Kuno's sword started flashing as watermelon slices dropped neatly to the ground. "You should know by now that throwing watermelons are useless!" "Hmph!" Ranma said as she picked a giant boulder and hurled at Kuno. The rock landed squarely on his chest, pinning it to the ground. "Hahaha... he deserved that!" Ranma laughed loudly. Then a watermelon landed on her head and knocked her unconscious. Kuno pushed aside the rock and looked at the girl. "Ahh...trapped on a deserted island with an unconscious, beautiful girl...it's just so..." **************************************************************************** "Lunchtime, dearest!" Ranma called out to her husband as she bore their youngest child on her back. Kuno walked over slowly. "We've been stuck on this island so many years...we're lovebirds in paradise, right?" He put an arm over Ranma's shoulder as they admired their four children. "I'm so blissful," she said... "YAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!" Kuno stared into Ranma's face. "Good. You're awake." Ranma, almost by instinct, slapped Kuno 8 times. "Hey! That hurt!" "Whew. Only a dream, only a dream,...where are we?" Ranma looked around. She noticed that they were apparently sitting at a table, slowly slipping a drink together, in some coffeehouse of some sort. "It's a local kissaten. It's called 'Deserted-kissa.'" [Translator's note: A kissaten is the Japanese equivalent of a coffeehouse. People go there to drink tea and socialize.] "Oh." Ranma got up. "Anyway, I'm getting out of here." "Wait a second; we were dating!" Kuno walked after her. "Remember? This is the only way to refresh my memory!" "That lack of memory sure hasn't changed your stupid ideas a bit." She continued to walk, out the door, down past the watermelon patch, anything to get out of this place. "Hold on," Kuno said as she scaled a fallen-down log, "there's a waterfall beyond that path." "Oh?" Ranma said skeptically as she continued on. There was a waterfall beyond, cascading its waters down the hill. "Omigosh, there really is a waterfall, Kuno. How did you know that?" "Huh?" Ranma came closer and looked into Kuno's eyes. "Kuno Tatewaki, could it be that you're starting to remember?" Kuno said nothing. Instead, he grabbed Ranma and hugged her close to his breast. *WHAP*. Ranma knocked Kuno to the ground. "Can't you be serious for a minute?!" Kuno got up. "Well, this scenery," he said, looking at the waterfall, "gives me a strong sense of deja vu..." "You've *been* here?" Ranma said. ************************************************************************ ************************************************************************ (posting 6 of 6) Meanwhile, farther up the mountain, Akane was searching for Ranma in a watermelon patch. "Ranma, where are you?" Akane mutted over and over as she fingered the hot water kettle in her hand. She looked at the waterfall running through the patch. "Huh?" Someone had created a dam of some sort. A bamboo mesh was in a section of the river, blocking umpteen watermelons from flowing downstream. The dam was connected to a rope, which ran over a nearby tree branch and was tied to a stake near the riverside. There was a note attched to the rope. It said, TRAINEES PLEASE PULL THIS ROPE. "So, this must be part of Kuno-sempai's setup for training." She pulled on the rope. The entire bamboo dam lifted up, allowing 20 or so watermelons to pass through and out of sight. ************************************************************************** "That's right! I remember standing in this exact waterfall, attacking watermelons with my sword." "Right!" Ranma exclaimed. You were here to fight with me..." Suddenly Kuno collapsed down, holding his head in his arms. "Is something wrong?" Ranma said. Kuno took out a shabby notebook. "Miss, if we could just trade diaries, I'll definitely be able to remember." "Hey! What kind of a trick is that at sich a time like this?!" She made a lunge at Kuno, who easily blocked the move with a sword. "Haven't you forgotten?" he said. "I'm stronger than you are." He took back his sword and held it in a direct attack position. "This island is completely deserted; scream and cry all you want, no one will listen...now, be a good girl and let me violently..." "NOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!" Ranma screamed as Kuno suddenly started chaising after her again. Upstream this time. "Give it up! Date me!" Ranma suddenly stopped as a barrage of watermelons came tearing down the waterfall. "What the...?" Kuno said. He started waving his sword. "Damn these watermelons! I almost had her!" He started slicing at the watermelons. "Yow!" Ranma said, barely jumping away from a quartered watermelon. "Jerk!" she screamed as she picked up a watermelon and threw it at Kuno's head. Kuno tilted his head. "Ha! You're not going to get me with that!" he said as the watermelon fell into eighths. An idea popped into Ranma's head. She tried throwing another watermelon. SWISH! It fell neatly into quarters behind Kuno. Hmm, thought Ranma, the watermelon cutting is completely reflexive on his part. In other words, I may have a chance! "Alright, I'll have to try it!" she muttered to herself. "Sempai!!" she said out loud, arms outstretched as she leaped towards Kuno. Kuno did the same. "You've finally agreed to go out with me?" "Yes, but first, a present." She leaped up and balanced a watermelon squarely on Kuno's head. Kuno immediately swung his sword upward... ************************************************************************ Akane heard a very large *CONK* as she climbed over the cliff. "Aha!" she said as she spotted Ranma standing in the water at the base of the waterfall. Where was Kuno? He must be that unconscious body floating in the water with a watermelon surrounding his head. "I've defeated the watermelon technique!" Ranma announced triumphantly. Akane let out a sigh of relief. ************************************************************************ After they dragged Kuno onto the bank and Ranma used the hot kettle of water, Akane asked Ranma for the story. "So, you got Kuno-sempai to try to cut a watermelon on his own head?" "That's right," Ranma said as he stared at the unconscious Kuno, "it was a conditioned reflex on his part. The watermelon training technique is to stand at the base of the waterfall and left many watermelons fall down, using them as targets. The problem is that after a while it becomes reflexive to cut any watermelon one sees. And when a watermelon accidentally fell on Kuno's head while he was training, he attacked it, hitting his head and losing his memory in the process." Kuno stirred and woke up and looked around. "Saotome Ranma! Tendo Akane! What are you doing here?" He removed the watermelon from his head. Akane smiled. "You recognize us now?" she asked. Ranma said, "Your memory's back!" Kuno rubbed his head. "I must have fallen unconscious while training." Ranma cleared his throat. "Kuno, I'm not trying to fool you with the statement I'm going to make," he said as his face became serious, "but your swordfighting ability has become outstanding." He patted Kuno on the shoulder. "I couldn't even get close to contacting you." Kuno stared at Ranma. "What are you talking about?" "Eh?" Ranma uttered, eyes widening in surprise. "You sent me this challenge..." he said as he took out the little piece of paper. Kuno read his own words. "Be prepared! You shall soon taste the fruits of my new training. Signed, Kuno Tatewaki." He turned to Ranma. "You must be mistaken," he started, "this is a love letter I wrote to the pony-tailed girl!" "Huh?" Ranma said. Akane's eyes widened. "That means..." Kuno stood up and started cutting watermelons. "Oh, pig-tailed goddess," he said, "how I wish you could be here to see my ability in watermelon cutting!!" Akane looked at Ranma. "How about some cold water?" "You've got to be kidding," Ranma said as he bit into a piece of watermelon.